IUI

So here we are, on the eve of my first IUI after baby.  I have no idea how anyone goes through multiple IUI cycles without actually telling their employer what they are doing.  I am not even on injectibles and I’ve still been to the doctor four times checking follicle growth and once before I started the meds to ensure I didn't have any cysts.  I honestly think I was gone only a little bit more from work when I was doing my IVF fresh cycle.  The difference is, the likelihood of this cycle working is far less than the IVF cycle, so it’s frustrating.  I really like to keep this sort of thing sort of quiet from my bosses until I’m actually pregnant, because it’s personal, and awkward to talk about.  I don’t really care if they know, but I don’t want to have to have “the conversation” with them when going through treatments. 

Anyway, the cycle has gone fairly well from a medical perspective.  Super easy medication.  I took letrozole days 3-7 of my cycle.  I had no side effects at all.  After some fairly uneventful ultrasounds, today my lining looks great and I have one mature follie.  Initially I had three that looked like they would mature, but thankfully only one did.  The other two seemed to have stopped growing.  Obviously they could mature before it’s all over with, but I’m more comfortable having just one.  I was testing at home with OPK’s and got my + today.  It is day 15 of the cycle, so ovulation (and IUI) will be on day 16. 

What is really causing me some stress is that my husband has started to get cold feet about having another baby (like right in the middle of this cycle).  I don’t really understand why.  I know he feels like our son is starting to be kind of a handful, (this is true) and he is envisioning himself chasing two of them around for the next several years.  I agree this sounds a little un-sexy, but I’m not sure how it differs from chasing one around.  One kid still makes it hard to jet off to a beach location, or even run out to dinner with little notice.  Everything requires planning in advance.  We already have a large property and livestock, so it’s not like we have a lifestyle that allows us a ton of freedom anyway.  I think it makes sense to just have a second kid now, so we can cram all this baby craziness into a small period of time.  Of course a second baby costs more, but we spend so much money on the maintenance and improvement of our home and property and don’t get near the fulfillment that a child gives.  I don’t know, I guess I’m just not on the same page, but this is an important issue to be on the same page about.  I not yet ready to plan on being a one child family.  It’s not a bad thing, but right now I still want that different dynamic that comes with two kids.  I guess I’m leaving that one up to God because even if he was to refuse to give me a cup of his sperm tomorrow (which I cannot imagine he would do), we could have conceived “naturally” this cycle, so what’s done is done.